Review: IT by Stephen King

Howdy strangers! I think I've decided to begin updating this blog again, tentatively.  I think I'm going to mostly limit my posts just to reviews for a while and see how that goes. :)

So, to kick things off with a bang, here's one of my reviews of IT, by Stephen King. I recently re-read this for my NJ Stephen King bookclub, but this is the review that I had written during my last re-read - the one previous to this readthrough. However, I feel that it's the better review so I offer it up here instead. Enjoy!


When I mentioned to a friend that I was re-reading IT, he replied with "Ehh, It's just Stand By Me with a monster. It's overrated." It should be noted that this friend is a movie person (if that wasn't apparent by his use of the movie's title, and not the story's title "The Body"), and I am a book person. It's like we're speaking different languages when we talk about King, because his books, in my personal opinion and with a few exceptions, do not good adaptations make. And since my friend is likely basing his comment on the movie, well... then we're talking about two very different things.

There are similarities between The Body/Stand By Me and IT - each has a group of kids inspired into action on behalf of a dead kid, and there's a bullying theme, as well as a main character that grows up to be a writer. Though I'd argue that these themes are not necessarily uncommon in King's writing in general. Writing about kids is something that King does remarkably well, especially kids who aren't necessarily strong or popular or conventionally "normal". He writes outcasts and kids who are different in one way or another, and where there are outcasts, there are bullies.

But IT is more than just a story about some kids who fight a monster. It's a story of finding the people who complete you, your Ka-tet, if you will. It's a story of bravery and imagination and belief and sacrifice and resilience, of the loss of childhood's innocence, of the necessity at times to recapture the essence of childhood in adulthood.

And IT's about a monster. What the monster is doesn't actually matter. It's like a boggart - it will be what you fear. The monster feeds on pure emotions, fear and chaos and anger and pain, and uses those things to create more. It's influence is a part of Derry, and Derry itself is monstrous in its indifference.

There are many little stories related in Mike Hanlon's interludes about how Derry residents participated in (or sat by and watched, or just ignored) horrible events... beatings, arson, murders, child abuse. The adults in Derry are too far gone in their Grown Up Minds to imagine that there's a source behind this mass violence and indifference... and so it's up to some children to stop it.

I loved watching these kids come together to form the Loser's Club. Honestly, it was a little heartbreaking for me at the same time, because I would have gladly been friends with every one of them, and it hurt me to see them so alone before they found each other. It hurt me to see Ben exclude himself automatically, on the assumption that the fat boy won't be wanted, in an attempt to prevent his own hurt in being excluded by others. It hurt me to see Bill's parents so horribly, selfishly excluding him from their grief and love and lives. They push him away at every turn, never once thinking that he might be hurting as well, never once thinking that he might be blaming himself or need help or support or just his parents. It hurt me to see Mike hurt and hated for simply being black. And Stan for being Jewish. And to see Eddie so cruelly limited and kept apart by his mother whose idea of love is wrapping the poor kid in bubble-wrap and never letting him experience anything at all. And Beverly, whose father's "worrying" leaves her black and blue... And Richie whose mouth runs away from him and gets him into trouble.

There was a bit, toward the end of the book, when Stuttering Bill is standing against IT, that almost brought me to tears despite it being a simple throwaway line in the middle of a dozen empowering realizations: "[...]no more Losers, no more cowering in a hole in the ground and calling it a clubhouse". This was cushioned on each side with powerful emotional images, but THIS line stood out to me, because even though it was just a hole in the ground that they called a clubhouse, the fact that they were together to inhabit it actually made it one, and I was so proud of them for just the simple act of friendship and inclusion that made the place special and safe for them.

And so it hurt me again when their friendship was a sacrifice. It just struck me as so unfair that these 7 kids who found comfort and safety with each other were not able to keep their memories of each other. That in itself is monstrous to me, because the friendship had meaning to them, even if they couldn't remember what they did with it, and for that to be taken was cruel. But IT, and life, I guess, just takes and takes.

I really liked the way that this was written, as well. How the past and the present wound together toward a central point of impact, and the duality of the story, rather than being hard to follow, was perfectly done and made the story. I loved learning about the Losers' childhood experiences as their adult versions' memories returned in increments. I liked seeing how the characters ended up, and how their lives were influenced by their childhood experiences - both positively and negatively.

I particularly respected Mike for his role as the one to man the lighthouse. Big Bill might be the leader, the one galvanized into action against the monster who murdered his brother, but Mike stayed and remembered and watched. And that takes a huge amount of courage in light of what he knew they were up against, and especially on faith that his now adult friends who have forgotten everything about IT will return to help him fight it again. What if they'd just said "Mike? Mike who? Got the wrong number, buddy." and hung up on him. Would he have tried to beat IT on his own? I think he'd have tried, because he alone knew that it would just keep killing kids, cycle after cycle, and that it meant to spread. I don't think that he could have lived with himself if he didn't do something, even if his effort was for nothing.

I also really liked seeing a lot of the references to the Dark Tower series (though they may actually be IT referenced in the Dark Tower books), and some other books as well. It took me a little time to place some of them, like the sunflowers at the Neibolt Street house saying "Our boy?", and I feel like there are still others that I didn't recognize, but it was fun to stumble over these little Easter Eggs.

I did find a few things a bit disappointing, though. I would have liked for there to have been more closure with Tom. I feel like he got off incredibly easily. And I thought that it was a little implausible that the spreading I mentioned would have taken as long as it did. Based on Richie and Mike's vision of IT's pre-historic arrival to the Derry valley, what took so long?

But overall, I loved the book this time around - much more than the first time I read it. I think that the format had a lot to do with that. Steven Weber read the audiobook for this one, and it was fantastic. His reading of IT, the giggle, the gurgling chuckle, the evil good humor fading into menace, and then to a towering rage were all enough to give me goosebumps. His reading of Tom and Bev's father were fantastic as well. He did the voices, but in a subtle way that felt right and not cartoonish or over the top (except when that was called for).

This is a book about children and a thing that lives in the sewers, so there were of course a fair few examples of toilet humor, but if you dig just the tiniest bit, there's a powerful story underneath. And I'm quite happy to say that I wholeheartedly recommend it.

NetGalley Review: Helium by Jaspreet Singh

Disclaimer: I received an e-copy of this book for review from NetGalley.

I was recently browsing around on NetGalley after, oh... Two years of inactivity there, or so. I saw this book, and it looked really intriguing to me. I loved the cover, and the book description sounded fantastic - a story about India's turbulent recent history, the assassination of Indira Gandhi... Intriguing stuff.

I really wanted to love this book. I was hoping that it would speak to me and allow me to learn something of what it was like to live through such things. I was hoping for this book to be beautifully written and expertly told. But unfortunately, almost immediately, I struggled with this book.

I ended up giving up on this at 20%. I just couldn't get into the story. I couldn't follow the narration - it jumped around, not only in time and memory, but between random, unconnected thoughts and observations. There are sentence fragments, sentences that seem out of order, and jumbled phrases that just don't make sense to me.

The writing and the style just didn't work for me. It's told in first person narrative, and I found it extremely hard to get into the main character and narrator's head. In fact, I didn't even know his name until around the 19% mark. (It's Raj.) Not that that's a requirement for me, but it does help to get to know the person I'm supposed to be closest to in the story. It also felt distant and cold, as though Raj's own history meant nothing to him. He describes witnessing a mob of men throw a tire over his teacher - his friend - and set him on fire as though it was nothing. He tells the story as though he's describing paint drying.

And intermixed in all of this is information about Raj's work in rheology - the science of flow.

But there seems to be no flow to this story. It's not fluid or smooth - it's choppy and jumps around seemingly without rhyme or reason. There are many words, and it's possible, even likely, that they'd come together in the end and form a cohesive whole, but even getting to 20% was a struggle for me.

Here's a quote to illustrate, from 8%:

"I shall never forget my last visit to his office. The 19th of October, a faultless day like any other. The laburnum quivered in the sun, I recall, so bright they hurt my eyes. I placed the borrowed item on his heavily cluttered desk; sheets and memos spilling over, glacial mountains and ice fields of exam papers and clogged lava flows of lab reports. Still weak, recovering from jaundice, I was in a way rediscovering the world; everything around me felt new and alien. Even the smells I took for granted in the past, and the dewy brilliance of objects. Without wasting words he checked if I had the energy to walk back to the hostel. I nodded. But he insisted on driving me in his white Fiat, which he drove slowly for my sake. On the way we talked about Maxwell's demons, he was also curious about my recently formed opinions and thoughts on Levi. I was unable to express myself properly. I said something about Levi's dark sense of humour. How he made use of snake droppings once to manufacture lipstick! Then we discussed briefly the chapter that left a huge impression on me. How the author had dealt with hunger. What really happened inside the 'concentration' camp. Up until that day the words 'dilute' and 'concentrated' were simply connected to the density of molecules in solutions (and not human beings). The writing had disturbed me, pushed me out of my comfort level. Those pages were set in a world I did not know."

This paragraph is just all over the place. It's random, and vague. It left me confused and didn't add anything to the story.

I'm sure that this book is amazing, or could be amazing, for the right reader. I don't think that I'm that reader. I no longer have the patience to wade through jungles of words to try to piece them into a story. I need more cohesion.

It's also possible that this is not the final copy as well. I am not able to find anything saying for sure whether this has been corrected yet, so it is likely it has not. If that's the case, further editing may resolve some of the things I struggled with. But as it stands, I just don't think this book is for me.

Review: Rain And Revelation by Therese Pautz ★★★★

I received a copy of this book from the author for review.

I haven't been accepting many books for review lately, because I dislike the feeling of obligation that accepting a book for review brings with it, especially the past chunk of time, with my reading so erratic and all.

But Therese emailed me, and I checked out the book and it intrigued me. The cover drew me in, and the description left me wondering, and both are good things. So I accepted a review copy, but then all that erratic reading happened again, and I sat on this one for over a month.

I picked it up last night, and I'll admit that right off the bat, I was a little apprehensive. This is written in 1st person present tense, which is honestly my least favorite narrative style. I thought right away that I was going to be constantly distracted by the narrative. I will admit that there were a few times that repetitive wording or phrasing jumped out at me ("If there's a choice, I don't see it" and "If I have a choice, I don't see it" both showed up within 9 pages of each other, for example), but once I got into the story, I was engrossed, and read the majority of the book in one sitting this afternoon. Which is pretty impressive, since, as I've mentioned, I have Erratic Reading Syndrome (ERS).

I am pleasantly surprised by how much I actually did enjoy this story, considering my first impressions last night. I thought that the characters were all well done, and understandable, if a bit frustrating. I truly felt as though I was trying to figure things out with Eliza as she went along - not just about the mystery, but also who Eliza is, or wants to be.

I got the feeling that Eliza had done a lot of growing up in a short time, even before the start of the book, and didn't yet realize it. Her interactions with Fiona just held that awkwardness of friends who are drifting apart but are unsure why or how. This is one of the things that I liked best about the book. We're not in Eliza's head a lot - just when she's actively questioning or piecing things together - but it never feels like there's any narrative missing. She is understandable and relatable, even if I don't always necessarily agree with her reactions, so it's easy to keep up with her moods and changes.

The story itself is interesting, and kept me reading through to the end to find out the answers to the questions, but also to find out what the repercussions of the answers would be.

I felt for Annie, after learning what she had gone through, and though the subject matter was grim, the writing was never manipulative or overly sentimental. I liked that quite a bit. Let the story speak for itself. If you've written a good one, it will. This one did.

Overall, I really enjoyed it, and I would recommend it to someone looking for a good way to spend a rainy afternoon.



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Review: Swift, Brutal Retaliation by Meghan McCarron ★

I picked this ebook up when Tor was offering it for free a while back. Apparently this story was nominated for an award, and based on that, and the title, I thought that it would be the kind of story I'd like. Sadly, I am disappointed instead.

I really don't know why this story would have been nominated for anything other than a re-write. It had potential to be really great, but everything that it could and should have been was missing, which is a shame. Everything in the story is just told to the reader: Ian died. Sinead did this to Brigid. Brigid did that to Sinead. Their mother cried. Their father stomped upstairs. Everyone was angry at everyone else, and most of it was misplaced. This last was literally told to the reader just like that. Cold. Distant. There's no reader investment in the characters, or the story, no emotional content at all, despite this being what could have been a really emotionally charged story of two sisters' relationship changing in the wake of their brother's death. There was no growth, no change, nothing was learned, there was no ending... this story just contained a bunch of things that happened and then ended as more things were happening.

I don't even know what the point of this story was. I thought I knew, while I was reading, but it was like a square peg being jammed into a round hole. It just didn't fit.

The more I think about it, the more disappointed I get. It's a shame, really. This honestly could have been a great story if there was just some spark of life in it somewhere. Some growth, something in the characters that made me feel for them. Instead it was just sad in a I-feel-sorry-for-this-book way, not in an emotionally sad way.

Blah.

Review: The Devil You Know by Mike Carey ★★★★

Despite like 20 people I know having read (or wanting to read this), I'd never heard of it until discussing the best Urban Fantasy books and series... And then, because I'm half-demon myself, this one stood out from the crowd and sounded like it'd be something I'd really enjoy. To be quite honest, I'm a little tired of the vampires and the werewolves and whatnot, so demons and ghosts seemed like a nice change.

And it was.

I really enjoyed this book. I've been in a bit of a slump lately, and so it seemed like it took me forever to read this, but I got there in the end and I liked it a lot. I loved the kind of... gritty realism the book had. It felt less like fantasy than real life - if real life had ghosts and demons and those who were capable of seeing and dealing with them.

This book seems to come with an intertwined recommendation: If you like The Dresden Files, read Felix Castor. And vice versa. (Again, odd, because last year I read EVERY SINGLE HARRY DRESDEN BOOK THERE IS and Felix was mentioned not one time to me... HMPH!) Anyway, I can kind of see why, because Felix and Harry both kind of have that snarky, just-a-guy-who-can-do-stuff thing going on. But, they were quite different, too. I've been thinking about it this morning, and it's taken me a little bit of time to realize it, but in SOME ways, I liked Felix more than Harry. (What? Like it's WEIRD to brood over fictional characters or something. Pfft.)

I don't want this to be come off sounding like a criticism of Harry, because it's not. Some of the things that I'm going to mention are parts of WHY I love his character so much. But they work in HIS world - not so much the one that Felix lives in.

First, Harry has this kind of (to use Hermione's words from The Order of the Phoenix) "saving people thing". He's chivalrous and kind-hearted with a dirty mouth and a quick temper. He has a lot of internal doubts about his ability to be the man -or the wizard- that he needs to be. Which is, of course, what makes him that man/wizard. Harry Dresden knows who he is and what his powers can do, and he has a kind of feeling of responsibility to use them to help people. I love these things about Harry, because the man that it makes him (without giving anything away) is one that I love and pity in equal measures.

But Felix was... just a guy. And I liked that. OK - maybe just a guy who was slightly more in tune with the no-longer-alive than most other people. He didn't have the hero thing going on. He didn't really head out into the fray to protect "his" city or to do good deeds... he just got caught up in a mess. He has his own doubts, his own dark history, his own fears. I really hope to see more of this in the remaining books in the series.

I liked the plot as well, and I think that it lent a good deal to the realism of the story. This was an already fucked up situation that went completely FUBAR, and then some. There are books (like The Dresden Files) where the fantasy is so entwined that to remove it would be impossible - and I wouldn't want to. But then there are books like this one, where the fantasy aspect is more... like an addition. Take away the ghosts and demons and whatnot, and you STILL have a really good story. With them, and you have a really good urban fantasy story. And I really liked that. But the fantasy aspects never felt tacked on or like an afterthought. They meshed perfectly with the story and the world, especially old city London with all its history, and I loved it.

I will definitely be reading more of this series.



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Review: Romeo & Juliet by William Shakespeare ★★★

Romeo & Juliet; Or: How Verona High Society Was Devastated Due To Two Kids Who Couldn't Keep It In Their Pants for 24 Hours.

This story is only a tragedy in the sense that, through their stupidity and selfishness, Romeo & Juliet caused others to suffer.

When we meet Romeo, he's in the throes of grief over Rosalind, who he is "in love" with, but who is not interested in him. Oh, he's in a right tizzy over her. The sun shines out her ass and all that, and the world is just a pit of despair without her in his arms, yada yada yada.

Then, OH HAPPY COINCIDENCE, he learns that she'll be at the Capulets' place for a party, so he can go stare creepily at her for a while, and just be in her presence. (Wonder if they had restraining orders back then?) Anyway, while at the party, Romeo blinks and forgets Rosalind completely, because pretty girl! And... is that...? Why yes. That IS the sun shining out of her ass. Someone must have just misplaced their flashlight at Rosalind's rear, because now that he's seen the true sun, there is OBVIOUSLY no comparison in the brilliance of the light.

We're told in the beginning of the story that Montague and Capulet have this feud thing going on. I dunno why, they just do. Makes for a convenient conflict. Tybalt, of Clan Capulet, recognizes Romeo, and thinks he's there to start shit. Remember - feud. So, he makes to fight him, but is shouted down... so he just files it away for future reference. AIN'T NO MONTAGUE GON' COME UP IN DIS CRIB, YO!

Romeo gets all kissy with Juliet. Juliet gets all swoony (it was her first kiss, being all of almost-14 and all), and within a few hours they are engaged. The next day they are married.

Taking things slow. As a lovely wedding gift, Romeo kills Juliet's cousin Tybalt. Well, I mean, Tybalt started it! *stamps foot* He TOTALLY killed Mercutio FIRST! DANG! And so he's banished from Verona.

Verona Death Count: 2

Juliet loses her shit.
Romeo loses her shit. (That's not a typo. Even Friar Lawrence calls Romeo out for crying like a little bitch.)

I would like to take a moment right now to talk about Juliet's moment of losing her shit. Because it is just a moment. Her nurse, who goodness knows needs to be slapped at the best of times, can't be trusted to relay a message accurately, and essentially mindfucks Juliet into thinking for a goodish chunk of time that it's Romeo who is dead. Understandably, Juliet is distraught at the thought that her boyfriend of 12 hours/husband of 3 hours is dead, and she didn't even give up her maidenhead yet (not making this up... she literally laments the fact that he'd not taken her to bed yet)... So, when Nurse FINALLY sets her straight that her boyfriend isn't the murdered but the murderer... Juliet is relieved, happy, and sees this as a comfort.

She sees the murder of her lifelong cousin at the hands of a dude she's known for 12 hours and who previously was a sworn enemy... a comfort.

And she didn't even know if the sex was good yet. O_o

Anyway... So, like... They meet up that night, Juliet finally finds out how the sex is (apparently good enough - WHEW!) and in the morning, Romeo leaves town (banished), and Juliet's kindhearted father promises her to Paris (who I am sure is a nice man, but apparently he ain't no Romeo) and when Juliet refuses, he casts her out. Well, he leaves the option for her to be uncast her out if she agrees to marry Paris. He's a good dad. So accommodating and caring.

She demands Friar Lawrence to help her, so he gives her a potion to allow her to fake her death. She lies to Mummy and Daddy that she'll marry Paris, and then fake-offs herself. Much sadness ensues. The Friar tries to tell Romeo of this plan, but his letter was waylaid, and he found out about Juliet's death through another messenger who didn't know it wasn't real, and he makes haste back to Fair Verona to real-off himself to spend eternity with his wife. Of two days, if my count is right at this point.

Apparently Paris also had the thought of going to visit Juliet, and he meets Romeo, they fight, and Paris dies.

Verona Death Count: 3

Romeo offs himself.
Juliet offs herself.

Verona Death Count: 4 & 5

The parents show up with the prince, who after about 5 minutes' investigation into the events, basically says "See what this stupid feud did? Everyone loses."

So, unless I missed someone in my accounting, Romeo and Juliet caused 2 1/2 deaths per day of their marriage. Could you imagine the state of Verona had they NOT both killed themselves out of angst-ridden lust?

The moral of this story: Just have sex and get it out of your system.


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Review: The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera ★

13% and I'm done.

I have had a run of books that have bored me, or annoyed me, or just did nothing for me. This one is... You know, I don't even know how to describe this one.

I pretty much hated it from the first page. I do not understand the high rating on Goodreads for this book. I can barely stand the thought of picking it up again and reading more of the words telling me things about characters that I could not possibly care less about.

We have Tomas, whom we meet standing on his balcony and vacillating between whether he should ask a woman that he's "in love with" (read: met in a chance encounter and became infatuated with) to move in with him. He's saved from making any kind of fucking decision by her showing up on his doorstep (literally) with her bags packed and ready to move in. Which she does. And then she clings to him (literally) every night - to the point that he controls her sleep patterns. He even, charmer that he is, fucks with her partially-asleep mind and tells her that he's leaving her forever, so that she'll chase him and drag him back home.

Tereza (that's the woman - I had to look up her name) begins to have nightmares that he's cheating on her and forcing her to watch after finding a letter from a woman in Tomas's drawer describing that very thing. So then, in the course of a sentence, we learn that Tomas has never stopped womanizing, then that he lied to Tereza about it, then tried to justify it, and now just tries to hide it from her, but won't stop.

And she stays. He gets her a dog, because the dog will hopefully "develop lesbian tendencies" and love Tereza, because Tomas can't cope with her and needs help.

So yes, Tereza not only stays, but marries him.

Why? *shrug* The book said so.

So then war comes, and they relocate... but after a while Tereza leaves Tomas (taking the female dog that they named Karenin and now refer to using male pronouns... Maybe to make Tomas feel as though Tereza has a lover as well? Who knows. This book is so stupid...).

She leaves him, and I think, "About frigging time." There's no reason for her having decided to leave him NOW, as opposed to any day of the 7 previous years of dreading him coming home smelling of another woman, of fearing that every single woman she sees will be her husband's next conquest. She decided to leave now... because the book said so.

And then he realizes that he can't be without her, and goes to her, and she takes him back, and then he realizes he feels nothing for her but mild indigestion and "pressure in his stomach and the despair of having returned".



I am a character reader. I need characters that I can identify with, that I can understand, maybe like... but these were none of those things. I don't know them, I don't understand them, I don't identify with them in any way... and I don't want to.

I just want to stop reading about them.

And so I did.

Review: The Fault In Our Stars by John Green ★★★

3.5 stars
Ok, so a little background, just to get a base point for some of my reactions to this book. In late 2010, I read Green's "Looking For Alaska". I ended up liking it more than I thought that I would, but for a long time I'd avoided it based on incorrect preconceived notions regarding what the book was about. It wasn't until I'd watched some of John and Hank Green's Vlogbrothers videos that I decided to go for it. And that made a difference. I could see John in the story - in the quirky intelligent teen characters, in the irreverence, and I liked it. After that, I bought "An Abundance of Katherines" & "Paper Towns", but I haven't read anything but their synopses yet.

So, flash-forward to present day. "The Fault In Our Stars" is chosen to be read among friends, and so I read it. And immediately, I'm struck again by the quirky intelligent teen characters, and the irreverence... But now, it's not so different, because now it seems like a pattern. A style. And that makes it less meaningful. When everyone is profoundly quirky and intelligent, it begins to seem a little trite.

So here again we have quirky intelligent characters, including a host of 16 year olds with ridiculously sophisticated vocabularies, and including an "extremely sophisticated twenty-five-year-old British socialite stuck inside a sixteen-year-old body in Indianapolis". These are midwest teenagers who sound like they're members of the Intelligentsia. Everything is profound and has "metaphorical resonance". It just didn't feel realistic to me.

Case in point: At one point there's correspondence with an author of a book that the main characters found profound, and I had a hard time differentiating between the voice of the Profound Author and the teens.

That shouldn't be the case. Ever. When one of the teens mentioned rhetorically whether the other thought they'd made up the Profound Author's letter, whether it sounded like something they'd come up with, I thought, "Yes!"

It's just too much for EVERYONE in these stories to be so quirky. Where are the average teens who just hang out with each other and don't use $10 words to say hi to each other? It was just unrealistic for me, especially in a book trying desperately to show that kids with cancer are just normal kids who shouldn't be treated deferentially just because they are sick. The problem here is that these weren't normal kids. These were extraordinary ones. Like everyone else. *sigh*

It took about half the book for this annoyance to peter out. It was like, at this point, the quirkiness and $10 conversations took a backseat to the story, finally. And that's when I really started to love it. Coincidence? I think not. Extraordinary characters are great and all, when, as a friend put it, they have "an ordinary background to shine against". I couldn't agree more.

I was far more affected and heartbroken by the simple, no-nonsense way that Hazel talked about her parents and how they were coping (or failing to cope) with her cancer prognosis than by her constant multi-syllabic conversations about the metaphorically resonant quality of... whatever.

There was a line near the end of the book that kind of summed this up perfectly:

"He wasn't perfect or anything. He wasn't your fairy-tale Prince Charming or whatever. He tried to be like that sometimes, but I liked him best when that stuff fell away."

I loved all the bits of this book that were in between all of the uber-profound stuff. The bits about loving and losing in terms of how much both hurt in stark terms of pure aching. Fancy words are fancy, but sometimes the beauty is in simplicity. When all the pretense fell away, and it was just two people wanting to spend as much time as they had left together, it became the story it always should have been.

This ended up being a moving and heartbreaking book, but I think it would have been a much better one had it been written more simply.

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Review: Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn ★★★★★

That was my immediate reaction after finishing this book. Pretty clearly that's not how it ends. It doesn't END that way. Yet, when I tapped Shadow's screen to turn the page (Shadow's my Nook's name, FYI) - there were only acknowledgements.

And then I thought about it... I gave it just a few minutes' thought, and I decided that I thought the ending was appropriate. Fucked up? Oh my, yes. But fitting too, in a way. We do dig our own graves, don't we?

This book kind of reminded of Lemarchand's Box. Every time you try to figure it out, it draws you deeper in, and in the end, reveals the kind of depravity that seemingly knows no bounds. Ineffable.

And I kind of loved it.

I thought I had this book figured out so early. I even thought I was being clever, despite knowing, KNOWING, that I was being carefully, artfully led to these conclusions. I was creative though. I had it all figured out. All I was waiting for was the vindication when the book caught up with me.

And then WHATTHEFUCK?! The twist. Oh my. I never, never saw it coming. Despite having accidentally seen the table of contents, which kind of give it away. But, then if you know me, you know that I don't want to know anything - so I put it out of my mind. And I'm glad that I did.

The first line of the Chapter of the Twist floored me. I read it four times, and still felt sluggishly stupid. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. I had never read Gillian Flynn before, only knew that her stories were dark, thriller types. But in that one sentence, I wondered if all along I've been reading a haunting story and not even realizing it. In a way that was right, but it's just haunting in the wrong sense. Or the right one, depending on your point of view.

This book kind of... resonated. It's easy to get caught up in it - or it was for me. I could see myself, my boyfriend, my friends and their significant others, pretty much ANY relationship, in this book. And that's disturbing. Everyone changes in a relationship. Everyone. I thought, early on, "Oh, this is a story of how relationships go bad when expectations aren't met - when people change, and grow lax in their status quo relationship..."

And it was, in a way. If the When-Relationships-Go-Bad-O-Meter goes to 11. Why not just make 10 more intense? Because this one kind of situation requires it go to ELEVEN.

The thriller aspect of this book was fantastic. It's not one of those non-stop rollercoaster thrill-ride books, where every page turn is another exciting development. This was like watching the water drain out of a tub, slowly, allowing you to see, little by little,what lies under the surface. And you realize that it's recognizable but stunted and deformed, horrifying, and clearly dead inside. But you can't quite stop looking. I loved every second of it. Learning about Nick and Amy's relationship, both how it was so right, and how it went so very wrong. The characters were real, disturbingly real. Every word was expertly placed to take the reader along on this journey, and it was brilliantly done. Loved it.

The moral of this story: Make an effort. It won't kill you... ;)

Review: Before I Go To Sleep by S.J. Watson ★★★★

(Read 09/09/12)
This morning I woke up and remembered who I am, who the man I live with is, what happened yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, and so on. There are things I can't remember, of course, things that maddeningly get stuck right out of reach when I try to think of them, and surely there are things I don't even realize I've forgotten, and maybe I never will. But I can remember the landmarks of my life, leading up to this morning when I woke up, and after reading this book, I realize that I take all this for granted. As almost everyone does.

When I started this book, and realized just what it would mean to have no memory of anything upon waking, every single day, I admit that the thought terrified me.

I am an empathetic reader; I put myself into the shoes of the characters in the stories I read and live their lives by the proxy of the book. Which, if you ask me, is the way it should be done. I WANT to be able to identify with characters and feel as though the events of their lives are real. I want to care about them, and fear for them, and hope for them. I don't want there to be distance between a story and myself. If there is, it's a problem, and I'm likely to not enjoy the book.

So, coming back to my point: This story terrified me. I thought of it in terms of my own life, and how much I rely on my sense of self to propel me through my life. I am me. The thought of losing "me" is terrifying. But it's more than that. Being only able to retain the memories of the events of a single day is a frightening, claustrophobic thought.

In a 16 hour day, between periods of sleep, how much time would it take to relearn your life? How much would you need or want to know? And what would you - or COULD you - do with the rest of your day, knowing that as soon as you go to sleep, it'll all be gone and the next day would start again just as the last had. The limitations of such a life are staggering. There's no way to LIVE in such a short time, when you have to relearn everything that came before just to get a base upon which to build. Could you trust the people around you to tell you the truth about yourself? The potential for manipulation and control would be so huge, even if it was done the with best possible intent.

It struck me that people who have lost the ability to retain new memories are stuck in a continuous loop of living hell, even if there's nothing overtly bad day to day. The amount of trust required to depend on others in a life like that is more than I could manage. It would drive me insane - never knowing whether the things I was being told were the truth, or if I was being told the things that would hurt or upset me the least. It would drive me insane to feel that I have a right to my own life and history, but not the means to it.

So... Just on that level, the empathetic way I put my feet into the shoes of the character, this book affected me quite a bit. I realize that most of this is what I brought to the table, but the story presented the day to day experience of a life lived on these terms in a way that made it easy to identify with, and so I count that as a success.

There were a few issues that I had with the book, though. The writing overall was great - easy to read, expressive and filled with imagery, but not overwritten. There were some sections that felt a little disjointed, such as this section:

"I am shaking, can barely breathe. I feel that I have not only lived an entire life in the last few hours, but I have changed. I am not the same person who met Dr Nash this morning, who sat down to read the journal. I have a past now. A sense of myself. I know what I have, and what I have lost. I realize I am crying.
[...]
I look at the clock next to me and there is a little jolt of shock. Only now do I realize that it is the same clock as the one in the journal that I have been reading, that I am in the same living room, am the same person. Only now do I fully understand that the story I have been reading is mine."

Besides the lapse into passive voice there, what jumps out at me is this: How can she feel that she has a sense of herself, that she has a history in one paragraph, but then just a few sentences later state that she hadn't attributed those things to herself before, and now finally understood that it was HER life? Perhaps if these paragraphs were reversed, then it would be less of a contradiction: 'I realize with a jolt the journal I've been reading is about my life. I feel like I've lived an entire life time in the last few hours. I now have a history, a sense of myself.'

Continuing on regarding the writing, the dialogue was a little wooden, I thought. A lot of name-comma-statements or name-comma-questions - but mostly the writing worked for me otherwise.

I enjoyed the pacing of the story, the slow unraveling of the mystery, and the shocks when Christine would realize something that she'd lost along with her memory, and they'd shock me too. How could someone forget about this, or that, or some other thing that others take completely for granted and don't bother even thinking of?

I also enjoyed the variances of Christine's personality. The different ways she thought about, and reacted to sex, especially. There were times when I felt clearly that she was in her 20-something memory zone, but trying to think about sex as a 47 year old who'd been married for two decades, despite the sex itself. Or when she thought of sex as a 20-something who hadn't yet settled down would. I thought that this was well done, and illustrated to me how much our personalities are defined by our memory. It was mentioned in the story as well that neither she nor her husband knew who she would "wake up as", but to me, the little details showed this more than the overt mentions did.

I felt that the mystery aspect was a little predictable, but at the same time, I feel like the reader is supposed to understand before Christine does. I had quite a few theories in the first half of the book, including (view spoiler)[the husband using his knowledge of chemistry to keep her from forming new memories, as a form of manipulation and control. She'd never even realize, and would be the perfect victim. But as I read, there was no daily pattern that would support this, evening tea, or a nightcap, or "medication" or mashed potatoes with dinner every night, or anything, so I let it go (hide spoiler)], and around the mid-point formulated the winning theory. But the fact that I was right doesn't bother me, as it usually does, because the reader has more info than Christine did, and the details were more intriguing to me than the event itself.

I did think that the ending was just a bit too rushed, and that the resolution was somewhat pat, too perfectly open ended, in a way.

Overall, this is a great book, and as it's Watson's first, it's impressive. I very much enjoyed it, and I look forward to reading more from him in the future.

Review: We Need to Talk About Kevin by Lionel Shriver ★★★★★

I started this review 6 times, and each time, I deleted it because it didn't quite convey the right thing. I think the problem is that I'm not sure just what that thing is. But one thing I do know is that I love books that make me feel like this... that "I don't know what I need to say but I need to say something, to talk about this with someone because this book won't keep quiet in my mind" feeling.

I guess it's lucky that this was chosen for our latest group read then, because I filibustered there with every jumbled, messy, half-formed thought that my tired-because-I-stayed-up-until-nearly-2am-with-this-book-then-worked-a-full-8-hours mind could think of... Because this book won't keep quiet in my mind. I finished it last night around 1:30am, tears streaming down my face, hurting for everyone and furiously heartbroken over something so unnecessary and so seemingly unavoidable as what was depicted. Then I slept, and I dreamed about this book, with hazy, distant figures without names or faces, but bigger than life aspects.

It's rare that I dream about books. It doesn't matter if I read it up until the minute I drop off; I only dream about a book I'm reading, or have read if it pulled me into its world first. I dream about the books that touch my soul. *cue dramatic music*

This book was just... wow. If I were to nitpick anything, it would be that Eva's pen wandered a tiny bit too much into the outside world. I wanted to see her world, the world of her family, or her lack thereof. It took a little bit to get there, and for a while, there were hints but the narrative meandered along in its own time. But oh my, once it got going, it really got going. I don't think it was just my last minute mad dash to read this the day before my bookclub meeting that helped me to read 75% of this book in one night after work... it was unputdownable. Once I glimpsed this family's world, I couldn't look away.

There is... so much to talk about in this book. And I don't think that I could even attempt to do the topics or themes any justice (as I didn't in my bookclub, not for lack of trying). This is a book that begs to be turned around to the beginning again and immediately re-read. It's like one of those optical illusions. At first, the picture is simple, but then once you see the hidden picture within it, you gain a new appreciation for the whole.

This book was beautifully written, insightful, questioning and heartbreaking. It was nothing at all like I expected, and even guessing the things that I guessed (which turned out to be true), it didn't make the impact any less. This book was so incredible at making me sympathize and empathize with each person's perspective, though we only see these through Eva's brutally honest memory, that it was impossible for me to lay blame anywhere, even though the potential for assigning blame was huge.

This was expertly executed (pun intended), and it is not one that I will forget any time soon.

Review: People of the Book by Geraldine Brooks ★★★★

I've had this book on my to-read list for a long time, 3 years or so, but it was one of those books that I didn't really think that I would ever really get to. A 'lifer'. I'd read Brooks' Year of Wonders back in 2008, and I liked it, but about 4 years has passed now, and the more I read in those intervening years, the more I came to feel like it wasn't really all that impressive, after all. I especially feel that way after finishing People of the Book. The writing in YOW just doesn't even hold a candle to the writing in POTB. It's a beautifully written, moving book, and I'm sorry that I put off reading it for so long.

I will say that there were parts of POTB that felt too modern for the historical sections, and even too "British" (mainly because the 'could/should/would have done' phrase sticks out like a sore thumb to me), and I thought that the romantic interest was awkward and didn't really ever sit right with me, but aside from those two things, I couldn't really find anything to criticize in this book.

I read for pleasure, and this book drew me in. I thought it was a fantastic melding of history, bibliophilia, socio-political issues, and life. I thought the characters were interesting, and even though most of them were only bit-players, I never actually felt like that's what they were while reading. They had history, and depth, and personality, and I very much enjoyed reading their stories, even when they were disturbing or heartbreaking.

But mostly, I loved this book for the story of the haggadah itself. I loved the way that the history of the book unfolded, with each clue to its journey through the years being shown as a story in itself, moving backwards in time until the origin of the book is shown. The historical sections were wonderful - they all felt completely real, although they were all horrifying as well, especially the 1492 Inquisition section.

I remember studying the Inquisition in school, and somehow it never really conveyed just how fucked up that shit was. That's probably why we never learn anything. We sanitize history to the point where it's completely lost all meaning, so we just keep doing the same shit over and over. We're still killing each other over differences in opinion regarding which religion is "right", or because a man dares to love another man and want to share his life with him, or because someone's skin is the wrong color, or because... we're just fucking bored and hate-filled. For fuck's sake. When will we grow up?

"You've got a society where people tolerate difference[...] and everything's humming along: creative, prosperous. Then somehow this fear, this hate, this need to demonize 'the other' --it just sort of rears up and smashes the whole society."

/soapbox

Fantastic book. I highly recommend it.

Review: House Rules by Jodi Picoult ★★★★

Confession time: I had no intention of ever reading a Jodi Picoult book. To me, her books were pretty much equivalent to Nicholas Sparks' books.* Formula: Mix one part "issue" with one part "sap" and one part "luuuuuurve", then swallow. If nausea occurs, try Pepto to keep it down.

*Sparks' books are still ones that I have no intention of ever reading. I watched 'A Walk to Remember' and 'The Notebook'. That's enough for one lifetime. There's like 50 movies based on his books now or something, and you know they're scraping the bottom of the barrel when Miley Cyrus is the best they can get to star act be filmed in one. *shudder*

So when this was chosen for my bookclub, I wasn't exactly looking forward to it, and prepared myself to be reticent at the next meeting.

Aside from that, I was worried about the portrayal of a teen with Asperger's Syndrome, particularly because the only other book that I've read with an autistic character was very disappointing for me. I couldn't help but mentally compare the two books, and my opinion of that other book was constantly reinforced: it just lacked substance, depth. It was just mediocre. House Rules was anything but mediocre. It was interesting, insightful, informative and fulfilling.

I'm no Asperger's expert, but I thought that the book worked on many different levels at portraying not only the thought processes and behaviors of one who has it, but also of everyone that is affected by it. I felt that Picoult did her homework, and that she presented the traits, and possible causality, fairly and honestly. There are perspectives on whether heredity, or immunizations, or just randomness cause autism to develop, and I liked and appreciated that it was not treated as an excuse to demonize vaccines.

I particularly empathized with Emma and Theo. Their perspectives were so raw and honest that I couldn't help but love them for it. Emma's raised two sons on her own for 15 years - something that is hard enough without throwing autism into the mix. Her whole life has centered around it. She's done everything in her power to give him the best life she can, and if she suffers for it, that's just part of the job.

There were points in Theo's chapters where he'd be thinking something that an outsider would think is horrible, and even berating himself for it, and I would just sit there commending him for the things he didn't say. For example:

"True confession number four: I don't sit around thinking about having kids, nor­mally, but when I do it scares the shit out of me. What if my own son winds up being like Jacob? I’ve already spent my whole childhood dealing with autism; I don’t know if I can handle doing it for the rest of my life."

This is a superficially selfish thought, yes, but then I read the subtext to be that he's assuming he'd be around to take care of any kid of his who has autism. He'd stick it out, not leave like his own father did. He'd try to do the right thing, even if he doubts his abilities to do it. It makes me proud of him, and sad for him, at the same time. Because he's lived on the sidelines of autism for his whole life already. His childhood was constantly colored by the routines and the contingencies and the chaos of his brother's condition. To never have "normality" would have to be a terrifying, daunting thought.

Regarding the mystery aspect, I pegged it pretty quickly - about 30% in. All the clues were there, and it wasn't hard to figure out. But I was still interested to see if I was right, or if there would be some twist, other than the one I predicted, to shock me. I kept being a little frustrated with the investigation too. This kid is extremely literal, and extremely honest. Why did nobody think to just ask him directly? I guess I understand why, honestly, but it was still kind of frustrating. And so for that, I knocked off a star. But the rest of the story, the personal and familial aspects, were fantastic. I loved it.

Overall, this was a highly enjoyable book, and I will probably be picking up more of Picoult's books now that I know they aren't likely to be tapped for maple syrup anytime soon. ;)

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Author Interview: Jolene Perry, Author of Night Sky

After losing Sarah, the friend he’s loved, to some other guy, Jameson meets Sky. Her Native American roots, fluid movements, and need for brutal honesty become addictive fast. This is good. Jameson needs distraction – his dad leaves for another woman, his mom’s walking around like a zombie, and Sarah’s new boyfriend can’t keep his hands off of her.

As he spends time with Sky and learns about her village, her totems, and her friends with drums - she's way more than distraction. Jameson's falling for her fast.

But Sky’s need for honesty somehow doesn’t extend to her life story – and Jameson just may need more than his new girl to keep him distracted from the disaster of his senior year.

Interview:

Jolene Perry is the author of Night Sky. Jolene grew up in Wasilla, Alaska. She graduated from Southern Utah University with a degree in political science and French, which she used to teach math to middle schoolers.

After living in Washington, Utah and Las Vegas, she now resides in Alaska with her husband, and two children. Aside from writing, Jolene sews, plays the guitar, sings when forced, and spends as much time outside as possible.

She is also the author of The Next Door Boys and the upcoming Knee Deep.

Q: Can you give a description of what the book is about in 5 words or less?
A: Boy. Girl. Mess. Another girl.

Q:  What about Night Sky do you think would appeal to those who are not Young Adult contemporary romance readers?
A: Jameson was a blast to write. I love that it took place in Las Vegas, and the bits of Sky's heritage were also a lot of fun. The thread of honesty weaves throughout - something that could be a part of any type of fiction.

Q: What is your favorite aspect of Native American culture?
A: Mostly the idea that we're all part of something a lot bigger than ourselves. I love people who are connected to the beliefs and the traditions of their families who are long gone.

Q: Jameson seems to have a lot of changes going on in his life - what advice would you give a teen going through something similar?
A: No matter how crappy life seems, it'll get better. We have a hard time seeing outside of what's happening in our lives at any given moment, but when we can, no matter what's happening now, will seem a little better.

Q: What is your favorite thing about being a writer?
A: That my hobby is my job, AND that I get to tell stories all day.

Q: Is there any particular message or theme that you hope someone would take away from Night Sky?
A: I love the idea that when people are really, truly, honest with each other, it can be a lot more exciting than being secretive.

Q:  If you could be a character in any book, which character would you be, and why?
A: This is a hard question to answer, because in a way, I get to be each person that I write, so I feel like I spend a lot of time in other people's shoes. The other thing is that stories tend to be real life, only with more drama. I honestly have enough drama, and prefer to be me. Kind of boring, but true.

Thanks so much for giving me the chance to be here today!!

~ Jolene

Where To Find Night Sky:

Purchase Links: For Your Kindle | For Your Nook | From Smashwords | PDF
eBook
ISBN: 9780983741862
ISBN: 9781466052338
Pages: 247
Release: March 1, 2012 

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline ★★★

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
You know that thing, the thing that everyone else thinks makes you the nerdiest nerd to ever nerd? That thing is what this book is all about, and it's awesome.

Mostly awesome.

This book celebrates the geekdom of the 80s. The music, the movies, the books, but especially the games and technology. Because the 80s were full to the gills of new technology that allowed games to move from boards to computers and game consoles. It allowed awesomeness like this to exist:

--------------------------------------
Announcer: Are you tired of dad?
Boy: Dad, no one wants to hear your stupid Vietnam stories!
Announcer: Are you tired of mom?
Mom: Hi angel, do you want to read a book or go outside?
Boy: No!

(Degenatron!)

Announcer: The arcade comes to your living room, only without the creepy guys offering to show you puppies.
Boys: Awesome!
Announcer: With the Degenatron, you can play video games just like you are in the arcade!
Kids: Excellent!

(Degenatron!)

Announcer: The Degenatron gaming system plays three exciting games including Defender of the Faith where you save the green dots with your fantastic flying red square.
Boys: Cool!
Announcer: Monkey's Paradise where you swing from green dot to green dot with your red square monkey.
Boys: That's rad!
Announcer: And Penatrator where you smash the green dots deep inside the mysterious red square.
Boys: WOW!
Announcer: The Degenatron brings arcade realism to your living room. It can even take quarters and a strange sweaty man comes by to empty the machine on Fridays.

(Degenatron!)

Announcer: Degenatron, fighting the evil of boredom.

Boys: I'll never go to school again!

(Degenatron!)
--------------------------------------

If you're not familiar with this, it's a fake commercial played on one of Grand Theft Auto: Vice City's in-game radio stations. GTA Vice City is set in 1986, and there are tons of references contained therein... Mostly of the 'did-they-really-just-say-that?' variety. The one above is a reference to the awful graphics of 80s computer and console games, and the creepy guys usually found around arcades. Speaking of which, anyone looking for a puppy? I know a guy...

Anyway. This book is exactly what GTA:VC isn't. It doesn't make fun of the atrocious 80s... it celebrates it. It celebrates the huge amount of innovation and change that occurred in that decade, and the huge amount of geekdom that fueled those changes. This book celebrates all that the D&D players have always dreamed... that they can do exactly what they love and hit it big by doing so.

That's what James Halliday did. He took his love of 80s pop culture and made it into the Moste Epice Queste EVAR before he died. He created the world's first truly immersive virtual reality game and free education system that is as vast as imagination itself, The Oasis, and promised to leave it and his megabillions (really) to the first person who successfully completes his quest: Find 3 keys, go through their respective gates, and then find the egg.

Enter 'Parzival' aka Wade Watts, 18 year old orphan (does one still count as an orphan once they've hit their majority?) who is obsessed with finding the egg and winning the ultimate prize. But maybe more than the desire to win is the desire to prevent the Sixers from winning. The Sixers are employees of The Oasis's rival corporation, who would love nothing more to win the Oasis cash cow and then start milking it dry. Instead of free use (services, such as transportation, is paid for in the Oasis, but logging in is free), there'd be a monthly fee, higher fees for everything and ads galore, which in the hard times of economic collapse shown in the book would reduce the availability to only those rich enough to pay. In other words, they'd ruin the only sanctuary that millions of people have from their hard day to day lives.

The first 3rd of this book was AWESOME. The parts of the book pertaining to quest and battles were awesome. The concept and the detailing and the story was all awesome. There were some parts that were so exciting I couldn't put the book down, but then there were others that were a bit frustrating or (dare I say it?) boring. So brace yourselves... I'm about to start inventorying my complaints.

This book seemed to go in waves. Something thrilling would happen, and then it would shift to very not thrilling. Then after a while, it'd start to build momentum again, and then the same thing again. So it was a little hard to keep my interest going the whole time, because I don't think that I need to know every single detail of the components of Wade's apartment or his gear for logging in and using The Oasis. I don't know what any of it means anyway, though I can guess it's pretty cool. It just got a little tedious and I got impatient to get back to the quest.

Likewise with the romance. Let me just say up front that I know Wade is 18, and has never really interacted with girls before, let alone an awesomely popular famous hottie girl who just HAPPENS to have all of his same interests and hobbies and whatnot in common with him, so I know it is unfair and unrealistic of me to get irritated by the romance element to this story... but I did. I just didn't much care. Just ONCE I'd like to read a story with a young adult protagonist that doesn't have a romantic theme, or at least not an insta-love one. It just got a little tedious and I got impatient to get back to the quest... again.

Then, the dialog. Oh goodness. It was awkward. It FELT awkward. Too forced and too "hip" and too everything, especially Aech's slang, and it felt fake. Didn't work for me there.

Finally, we come to the issue of death. I feel like the way death was portrayed in this book was somewhat ridiculous. First, let me say that there were two kinds of death: avatar death and real world death. Avatar death means that your Oasis character dies, you lose all your stuff (status, inventory, credits/money), and you start over from no0b status. Real world death means you, the person who exists in the real world, actually die, for realzies, no do-overs, no resets, no reloads, you're just dead. D-E-D, dead, as my daddy would say.

Now, there were a couple of RW deaths, and it was one of these where I couldn't put the book down. It was crazy intense and I just had to know what was gonna happen next. But for all the intensity, it didn't seem to register much on Wade's "Oh Shit!" scale, at least not when it came to avatar death. There's a scene where a big battle is going down, and avatars are rushing in to do battle without hesitation, knowing that it could mean their death, and it was portrayed as really brave and harrowing. And I wondered to myself... So what? Why the dire reaction? It's just some data in a server somewhere that would be zeroed out and that person could create a new one. It's not a real life-or-death situation, so I don't really feel like it was all that brave.

But then on the other side of the coin is the fact that the bad guys could go after Oasis players and Real World kill them. Yet at the end, there's no tension around this possibility, because deus ex machina arrived to provide the way, or it was just conveniently forgotten that the real world existed in the heat of battle... or probably both.

So... While I really did enjoy this one, obviously I had some pretty large issues with it. It was a fun story, and I have already recommended it to a few of my friends that I think would enjoy it, but I admit that I wish I'd enjoyed it even more than I did.

I'm very curious to see where Cline goes from here though. I'd definitely pick up his next book, and in the end, that's really all that matters, isn't it?

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Review: Leviathan Wakes by James S.A. Corey ★★★★★

Confession Time: I'm very bad at categorizing genres and sub-genres, so it didn't dawn on me that Leviathan Wakes would be considered a "space opera" until I saw it in the genre listing on the book's Goodreads page. I still don't really know what that is (space opera, not a Goodreads page), despite having read the Wikipedia page and stuff. I think of "space opera" and this comes to mind:

Probably not the same thing.

But I did realize that my last attempt at reading a "space opera", The Warrior's Apprentice, left me distinctly underwhelmed.

So, if not for Audible, this book was probably a Lifer. By that I mean a book that will just sit on my radar forever, but never actually get picked up and read -- at least not for a long, long time. I have lots of these, unfortunately. There are just too many books, and too little time in the day. (If only my job would stop being so insistent that I show up!)

How did Audible, that evil (MWAHAHAHA!) Amazon company, factor in you ask? Well, not only did they give me a $10.00 credit for my 1 year anniversary of having an account with them (woohoo! free money!), but then they also put this audiobook on sale for $4.95. So Audible bought me this audiobook. And it rocked. Thanks, Audible!

So let's get down to business and talk about how much I loved this book.



Wait, wait... no... I was right before. This much:



Because I loved The Fifth Element, and I loved Leviathan Wakes.

This book had everything. Great, believable, and realistic characters, an interesting plot, fantastic scope and worldbuilding, just the right amount of plausibility to make it terrifying, brilliant humor that was perfectly timed and hit just the right notes to make me laugh out loud, and it had what were awesomely called 'vomit zombies'.

In fact, the only thing I can find to criticize, and it's more of a nitpick, is the overabundance of saids peppering the narrative. Holden said, Miller said, Naomi said, Fred said, Amos said, etc etc etc. Listening to the many saids being read was a little tedious, but only occasionally; it was mainly noticeable during long stretches of pure dialogue.

Otherwise, I loved everything about this book, and the reading. The reader did a great job at letting the story do the talking, and despite only getting to listen to this in small chunks at a time, I was engrossed in the story.

I loved the characters, and especially enjoyed the way that the two main characters, Holden and Miller, interacted with each other. They are from different sides of the personality spectrum, with two completely different ways of handling a situation, but when the shit (or the zombie vomit) hits the fan, they effortlessly slip into "Let's discuss this when we aren't dead" mode, and just kick ass. I loved it. I thought they complemented each other wonderfully, and the arc of their working relationship was realistic and understandable, from both sides.

Which brings me to the dual narrative. This story is told by alternating viewpoint chapters, and I thought it worked perfectly. We get to see things from two different perspectives, and it allows for so much more story information to be conveyed without huge info-dumps. I liked the noir detective story feel of Miller's chapters, and it contrasted nicely to the more high-tech, adventure feel of Holden's chapters. And then when they run into each other and become a sort of hybrid, I loved that, too.

Speaking of the technology, I thought it was brilliant. We've colonized other planets, and moons, and we can mine ice from Saturn's rings, and travel through space at 7+ Gs. The methods of combating nausea and blackouts during travel at these speeds is interesting, and plausible. The technology that allows us to live on little rocks millions of miles away from the sun is fascinating. But it's still familiar, in a way. RADAR and LADAR are things I've heard of. It's not too much of a stretch to get from where we are now, to where this story shows us in just a few short centuries.

The Protogen project is also plausible, and frankly terrifying, as is the reaction to it. I was totally Team Miller on this one, despite usually landing on Holden's side of the opinional axis. I shudder to think of situations like the ones depicted in this book, and can't help but think that it would happen exactly like this if it were to one day come to pass. I would hope that we've learned from past mistakes... but we don't. This is not-too-distant-future, where we've colonized the solar system, but we're still human. Racism and bigotry is larger scale, because our bodies have adapted to living off-earth, but our minds are still stuck in the 'us vs them' small-town mode, and now we just have more differences to divide us.

But I digress. I loved this book. I loved the world(s), and the characters, and, well, everything. This worked perfectly as a stand-alone novel, but I definitely cannot wait to read more of this series.

Review: The Lions of Al-Rassan by Guy Gavriel Kay ★★★

This book has come highly recommended by almost all of my friends, and so naturally, I was very excited to read it. This was my first experience with Kay, and the consensus seems to be that this is his best work. Certainly the Goodreads average rating bears that up. Lions of Al-Rassan currently has a an average rating of 4.27 of 5. Pretty impressive, and the highest of all of his books.

It just didn't quite get there for me. Maybe it was the expectation of greatness that let me down, but I don't know. Maybe the fact that I don't have much knowledge of the history of the Iberian peninsula, but again, I don't think so. By all accounts, it's not really necessary to have external knowledge prior to reading Lions. It's not that this was bad, or that I didn't like it... In fact I'm having a hard time putting my finger on just how I'm feeling about it, now that I'm finished. On the one hand, I liked it quite a bit, but on the other, I felt like there was just something missing or off about it, and I had several issues that I can't ignore.

So this is going to be something of an itemized review...

Characters: This was by far my favorite thing about this book. I am a character reader, and I need characters that I can identify with in order to enjoy a story. This one was full of brilliantly real characters. There was quite a cast, as shown by the full character list at the beginning of the book, but I never felt confused by who was who. I loved the four main characters: Ammar, Rodrigo, Jehane and Alvar. (I also loved Rodrigo's wife Miranda, who was awesomely bad-ass. I would have loved to see much more of her.)

Ammar and Rodrigo kind of represent their people and cultures in the book, although not well at all. Most of their respective cultures are caricatures of pious intolerance and hatred, whereas Ammar and Rodrigo are both good, honorable, and open-minded men, who are willing to accept and trust based on character, not purely on belief in the "right" god. So while Ammar is an Asharite and Rodrigo is a Jaddite, they still find a way to work together.

There were quite a few emotional moments while reading this, and though I feel like they could have been better written (which I will get to in a bit), I still felt for the characters and the things that happened to them. I did feel like some of the follow-up with some characters left something to be desired, but the characters themselves were well done and fleshed out and real.

Worldbuilding: The worldbuilding here was one of the aspects that I struggled with the most. At times it was overwhelming in the amount of information given at once, but still I felt like there was still more I wanted to know. There were places named that we never got to see, but were clearly important to the history, like Aljais, or Soriyya. The descriptions were gorgeous, and I could see everything clearly, but I wanted to know more about the places that were important but never shown.

Religion: The religious aspects of this book were well done, and the dividing lines between the three different religious groups were drawn clearly, but I wanted to know more about what each believed in, not just who they hated and wanted dead because they believed in something different.

Not knowing what they actually believed in, it was hard for me to identify with either the Asharites' or the Jaddites' beliefs. Are these gods so bloodthirsty that the only valid form of worship is saying that you do and then killing those that don't? Was there no other form of worship? The Asharites abstain from alcohol, but unless I missed it, I don't see anything at all that differentiates them other than the name of the god they worship and whether or not they'll have some wine with dinner.

The Kindath were different though. I don't know much about their beliefs either, but it seems to me that they were to be equated with Jews, at least in the way that they were treated and persecuted. They at least seemed peaceful, wanting nothing more than a place to live peacefully. This apparently equates to baby-killing monsters to the bloodthirsty Asharjaddites, who both hate the Kindath. Because who better to persecute than the people who aren't allowed weapons? That being said... it was realistic and believable that different religious sects would want to kill each other. Not logical, but religious belief rarely is.

Writing: For the most part, I liked the writing. I thought that it was readable and in general, the prose was beautiful. There were some unexpectedly funny parts, and overall I liked it.

But I did have a big problem with the writing in one aspect, which was that anytime there was a moment of suspense, Kay would write the scenes in such a way as to draw it out to unnatural lengths. For instance, the one that bothered me the most was a scene in which a character died. For nine pages, we were left wondering who it was, theorizing, trying to determine who it could be. By the time the name was finally given (and it was an unexpected one), I was more annoyed with the delay tactics and manipulation than I was distressed about the character's death. I was upset about the death, but it was kind of overshadowed by a feeling that I was being manipulated. I felt that it cheapened the loss, and took away from the emotional impact it should have had. This was done in different ways and in different situations all throughout the book, and it was incredibly frustrating.

Another issue that I had was Kay's tendency to skip action, and then tell us about it later. I can sort of understand the decision for doing this. It allowed him to not only tell us what happened in condensed form, but gave us insight into some of the characters as well. I just didn't like it. I want to see the action. I want to be part of the story, not an outsider being filled in on the details later.

Pacing & Plot: At around the 75% mark, I started wondering where this story was going and how it would possibly be resolved in the remaining pages. We've been with these characters for a while, and there's been a lot of build-up and pieces moving into position, little battles and maneuverings, but nothing has really happened yet. The huge campaign to reconquer the disparate peninsula lands and reunite them into one large kingdom of Esperana hasn't even started. Of course, the epilogue sorts out what happened and fills us in on the important details. All the build-up and then the climax felt rushed and almost like an afterthought. Disappointing.

I wanted to love this book. Maybe if I'd read it before reading some of the amazing epic fantasy I've read in the last year, I would have. But the writing here just felt like it got in the way of the story. Yes, it was beautifully written at times, but the need to be mysterious and drag out the suspense, and circle back to tell us about the action or important events rather than just showing them to us to begin with really didn't work for me.

TL;DR Review: I liked it, but thought parts could have been better.

Bookclub Review: Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes ★★★★

I have three confessions to make:
1) I never read this book in school.
2) For some reason, this book is associated with the A-bomb in my mind. No idea why.
3) There was beer at my bookclub meeting, and I drank a goodish amount of it, so this review may ramble.

Needless to say, Flowers for Algernon was very, very different than I had always thought. I honestly cannot tell you why I thought that... just that I did. It's just one of those weird association things that people have. Or maybe it's just me. Unsure which.

So, after I read the book description and realized that I was way, way, off, I was actually really looking forward to reading it. I love overcoming adversity type books, I love books that make me feel something, and I love books that make me think. This is definitely one of those, but still I feel like there was something off about it. I liked it, a lot, but I wanted more perspective, I guess.

Quick run-down: Mentally handicapped Charlie is undergoes an experimental operation to increase his capacity for learning and intelligence. The book examines his journey, and what it means, intellectually, socially, emotionally, and morally. Very interesting stuff.

I liked Charlie, more so the less intelligent he was. It was easier for me to sympathize and identify with him then, rather than at the height of his intelligence, when everything and everyone seemed beneath him. I can identify with aspirations and dreams, but I find it hard to understand intelligence so massive that it's alienating. I did like that the more that Charlie learned, the more was able to understand about the world around him, but it was often heartbreaking to see his revelations. Heartbreaking to me, anyway. One of the things that I felt was off about the book was that Charlie seemed distant from his own experiences and memories. He often saw his "handicapped" self in memories as a different person, and his discoveries of memory and experience were like watching something happening to someone else, rather than to himself.

I also wanted more of the history, and more perspective on the story. We see everything through Charlie's eyes, and while this works for most of the story, because we're in his head and we can almost experience his changes directly, some parts just lacked perspective, to me. Particularly the parts dealing with Charlie's incubator mother.There were a lot of parts where Charlie remembered her behavior and her actions and reactions and attitudes, but he couldn't identify with them, or understand them at all. And the reader, seeing through Charlie's eyes, sees the cruelty and the intolerance and impatience, but there isn't anything to give perspective to these memories. We don't see how hard it would be to deal with a young mentally handicapped boy, while caring for a newborn, and constantly worrying that one lapse in vigilance could result in disaster. We don't see how hard day to day life would be with a mentally handicapped 17 year old... we see only the extremes.

Am I condoning her horrific behavior? Absolutely not. Never. But I can put myself in her shoes and imagine just how hard it would be. And knowing myself, and how patience is NOT one of my best qualities, I can understand her frustration and fear and anger. I hope that I would never, ever, ever act on them like she did, that I would have the insight and compassion to accept the hand I'm dealt, should I be put in that position, but I can sympathize... to a point. Past that point and I don't think there's a punishment severe enough to make up for the way she treated her son. Not in a hundred lifetimes. Charlie had every chance to be happy, despite his handicap, and she ruined him.

Forgiveness isn't one of my virtues, either.

I did like the themes in the book, of second chances, at taking a risk, at wanting to better oneself and understand who we are and who we are in the world and what it means to be who we are. I liked the theme of one person being able to make such a difference, such an impact on the world, and it gives me hope that there is a point to it all. I liked the theme of learning to accept the life we have, and that sometimes ignorance is bliss.

Overall, I enjoyed the book, and it definitely was a hit with the bookclub. Very glad that I read this one. :)

Review: Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson ★★

2.5 Stars
This is an issue book, a book about a terrible thing, and how one person copes with it. I pretty much knew what the unspeakable thing was going in. It wasn't really hard to figure out even before I started, but I didn't feel like this book was about the "what happened", but rather that it was about the "what happens next". In a way, it worked for me, but in others it definitely did not.

I felt a little like Melinda's art teacher, wanting more life and honesty to shine through. Some parts were really good, poignant and realistic... but they were the wrong parts. The parts I wanted the most depth and honesty from were the ones dealing with what happened, with the loss of everyone Melinda could confide in, the inability to make people see her pain. I wanted those things to speak to me, and I feel like other aspects of the book were louder, more focused on. Melinda's sarcasm and wry sense of humor, even if it's just inside her head, for instance. Her observation of the social cliques and school were right on. I liked her voice, her sardonic viewpoint, but I wanted less of that and more of her coping with what happened to her. No... I take that back. I didn't want less of that, I wanted it to relate more to what she was going through. It felt like being inside ANY sarcastic highschool freshmen's head.

The "what happened" part is almost unimportant, except that it's the catalyst for this story. It's supposedly the thing that silences Melinda... but I don't really get that. I can understand her fear, but I don't feel like it changed her much otherwise, and it just seems "off" to me, somehow.

It's the little things that make me feel this way, that there's not enough contrast between "before-Melinda" and "after-Melinda". Her room not having its own Melinda personality and resonance, her routine post-it note communication with her family, her thinking about what her friends will think of a boy paying attention to her before thinking about what SHE thinks of a boy paying attention to her... It's like she has no personality of her own. So her silence doesn't have the power I wanted it to have.

I wanted her silence to speak volumes. I wanted to see the huge changes in her, the unignorable wrongness of her tongue being trapped by fear. I wanted to see all of that and more... even if it was only for my benefit and nobody else around her could see it, if that makes sense. We're the ones in Melinda's head, seeing her world through her eyes and living her life along with her. I wanted to really feel it... and what I felt was more like a very introverted girl than a victim.

When Melinda finally found her voice, I wanted more resolution. I wanted to see the repercussions, for everyone involved, and for Melinda to really find strength and use it... and I felt like that was all kind of glossed over in a "who's the outcast now?" kind of highschool way. Really? No criminal charges? No counseling? Nothing? I wanted strength and inspiration to come pouring out of the last pages of this story, but instead, the story just ends. We can extrapolate and hope that Melinda gets there, but we're technically on our own.

I had very high expectations for this book and I wanted to love it. While I enjoyed some aspects of it, the aspects that I really wanted to shine just didn't. I wanted more, I expected more, and unfortunately, I just feel like this one fell really short of what I'd hoped it would be.

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Review: Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck ★★★★★

"Guy don't need no sense to be a nice fella. Seems to me sometimes it jus' works the other way around. Take a real smart guy and he ain't hardly ever a nice fella." - Of Mice And Men

I really think I love John Steinbeck, which is surprising to me, because I never would have thought of myself as a Steinbeck reader. There's just something about the way he writes that cuts through all the bullshit and pretense and just tells it like it is, and I find that really refreshing. Sometimes they aren't easy, and sometimes they hurt, but it's the kind of hurt that, hopefully, makes us want to be better. At least it makes me feel that way.

I know it'll be hard for those of you reading this to believe, but I can sometimes be a bit of a bitch. I can be demanding, irrational, impatient and moody, and sometimes my annoyance and irritation is taken out on unsuspecting innocents, or at least people who don't really deserve the hell I serve up on a platter. So, this book resonated with me. George resonated with me, and I felt myself willing him to be patient, to just try to understand Lennie's perspective, all while my face is flushing red from the knowledge that I don't always practice what I was preaching. I'm a damn hypocrite.



I really felt this book, as seems to be the case with the Steinbeck books I've read lately. I could identify with all of the characters in some way, and I love that. In such a short book, it's easy to get the characters very wrong... either they are caricatures, or they are cliches or they just plain stink and are boring. I really felt like I understood these characters, even if I didn't like them. At the end of the book, when Lennie asks George to yell at him, isn't he going to hit him, isn't he going to tell him he'd be better off without him, I found that just heartbreaking... that Lennie's sense of normalcy stems from George's frustration with him. I felt for George too. He only wants to take care of Lennie, but sometimes it's so hard. He can't be everywhere at once, and has had to make so many sacrifices in order to keep Lennie out of the kind of trouble that just comes from not knowing any better.

This story is just a smidge over 100 pages long, so it won't take you long to read at all, and I highly recommend it. Or you could take about 3 1/2 hours and let Gary Sinise read it to you, which is what I did. I wasn't sure about Gary at first, but he grew on me really quickly. I've never seen the movie, so I didn't know that he'd starred in the remake. Gary Sinise has a very recognizable voice, at least I think so, and it's kinda the opposite of my "preferred reader", but I thought he did a wonderful job reading this. The voices and the characters were all just right, and I'm not normally a "voice" fan when it comes to audio... I want the story to speak for itself.

This one definitely did that. This is the kind of story that will stick with me for a long time. As I was listening, I kept writing notes about thoughts that struck me, feelings that I had, concepts and themes in the book, and all sorts of interesting stuff that I don't really know how to express without spoiling this wonderful little story.

"The best laid schemes of mice and men oft' go astray." -- Robert Burns

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